|A Girl and Her Hamster|
Our household was in such a hamster frenzy over Ninjy Hamster that it was apparent to everyone but me a second hamster was in the cards.
Nixie arrived on Christmas and she is actually a he.
Child #1 really, really wanted a girl, but since I refuse to deal with hamster pregnancies and hamsters eating their young, we just decided to do a gender reassignment.
Nothing shocking about that, I mean come on, we live in the People's Republic of Portland where the only citywide goal I've identified is expressed on bumper stickers and t-shirts reminding everyone to 'Keep Portland Weird'.
But back to the hamster. At first she was just Nixie, but since my kids like their hamsters with a healthy serving of backstory, she's since developed into Nixie Minaj, pop star to the hamster world.
"She gives concerts from her cage at night. Want to know what she sings?" I was walking the kids to school while my daughter was expounding on hamster world happenings.
|Science Project Fodder|
She sang it anyway. To the tune of of Nicki Minaj's Starships. "Some hamsters are meant to fly. Paws up and touch the sky." After that I was treated to a rendition of "Sleep All Day," sung to the tune of Pound the Alarm.
Meanwhile, it saddens me to report that Ninjy has passed on to the big cage in the sky. It was either a heart attack or internal injuries. Hamsters are heart attack prone so we're going with the first alternative.
Although Ninjy was mourned deeply for several hours he was replaced later that day by Nibble, who true to his name, has performed some surgical nibbling upon child flesh. But we are nothing, if not hardy hamster tamers at the Garth household because Nibble is
When Nibble's not biting my kids, his backstory is trainer to the hamster stars. That's right, he's responsible for the workout that keeps Nixie Minaj looking sweet and chubby.
We may have one gender-reassigned pop star hamster and another who, in the voice of Child #2 talks a lot about push ups, but at least we won't have babies. Maybe Nixie Minaj will be inspired to write a song about that.