That's the way it's always been for me and my attitude about sex. In lieu of a cool, spot-on phrase I would say things like I'm accepting or non-judgmental, but then at some point during the last two years (Yes, I've been living under a rock and it's name is children) I discovered the whole Sex Positive movement.
Music played, lights flashed and I was like, oh that's a perfect phrase for what I think and feel about human sexuality. Here's the definition that I grabbed off Wikipedia and, kids, if you're reading this, remember Wikipedia is not to be trusted for homework papers
Sex positivity is "an attitude towards human sexuality that regards all consensual sexual activities as fundamentally healthy and pleasurable, and encourages sexual pleasure and experimentation. The sex-positive movement is a social and philosophical movement that focuses on acceptance and advocates these attitudes along with sex education and safer sex as part of its campaign. The movement makes no moral distinctions among types of sexual activities, regarding these choices as matters of personal preference.
This shouldn't come as a surprise.
I have an eleven year old daughter who is launching headfirst into a culture where girls starve themselves to look like models and even models need to be airbrushed to meet the unrealistic standards of beauty that are set. If you haven't seen the Dove Real Beauty evolution piece, take a minute to watch it and you'll see why this topic gets me angsty.
Enter Laci Green.
She's my new hero (or since I'm calling myself Sex + maybe I should say heroine). Her clips on YouTube talk about relationships, body image and sexuality in a healthy upbeat way. Even more importantly, from my perspective, she's a young, hip, twentysomething who is saying all the things I want my daughter to hear.
As I mentioned before, my daughter is eleven.
Every time I talk to her about things like getting her period she clutches her ears and moans like my voice is toxin.
Which I get. I'm her mom. But Laci Green isn't. While my daughter isn't ready for the videos about losing your virginity, I think she's the perfect age for Period Hatin' and "OMG" - 12 Year Olds Aren't Sexy.
Instead of handing my little girl a book about "The Blessings of Menstraution," and never speaking about it again, we'll pop ourselves some popcorn, fire up YouTube and I'll let Laci Green say all the things I want to say. They all boil down to love your body, love yourself and know your worth isn't determined by what you see in the mirror.
Which, when I stop to think about it, is a message that's just as important for grown ups as it is for little girls.